I have here in my hand a list of 205 that were made known to the Secretary of State as being Conspiracy Theorists and who nevertheless are still working and shaping policy in the State Department.

Bin Laden Killed?

Pics or it didn't happen.

Top Ten Miracles Performed By Pope John Paul II:

10. Turned water into ice

9. Once ate at Pizzeria Uno without taking Pepcid AC

8. Took a leak at the airport and the urinal flushed itself

7. First pope to visit a boy scout meeting without getting a boner

6. Popemobile beat the ice cream truck in a drag race

5. Went to see Bruce Bruce and didn't laugh

4. Didn't punch George Bush in the face after being called Sir

3. Predicted the Golden State Warriors wouldn't win a championship

2. Lost to Chuck Norris at arm wrestling, but only by a little

1. Finally offered a formal apology for the Galleleo affair after centuries of recalcitrance, truly a miracle!

RL CHAMPION EXCLUSIVE!!! The 1st Notch Revealed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RL CHAMPION EXCLUSIVE

LIFE IS SHORT AND I'VE BEEN MAKING YOU GUYS WAIT FAR TOO LONG. THE RL CHAMPION ULTIMATE TURBO 20-NOTCH SYSTEM™ IS HERE. THE TIME IS NOW.

HERE

IS

THE

FIRST

NOTCH

RL Champion Ultimate Success Stories Vol.1

I spend a lot of time lecturing you guys about getting RESULTS with the RL Champion Ultimate Turbo 20-Notch System™, but I recently discovered a shocking secret that changes everything FOREVER.

As it turns out, not everybody is a good listener. It's not that you guys aren't trying to understand the POWER of the SYSTEM, but get this: I know I don't usually admit to being wrong, I'm perfect after all, but this time I have to admit it: I have some room for improvement. It's not easy but there I said it. I counted on you guys listening and understanding, but my message is just too powerful for most guys to comprehend. That's how this all got started.

Beginning today, I'm going to keep lecturing you to work the RL Champion Ultimate Turbo 20-Notch System™ (you're not getting off THAT easy, ha! Ease causes gynecomastia and Prius ownership, I won't ever let THAT happen to my loyal readers). But from now on, in addition to TELLING you the benefits of working the System™, I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU- real life success stories of guys who have taken it up a notch by working the System, The RL Champion Ultimate Turbo 20-Notch System™

Obama Reelection Speech Leaked

Full Text:

Many things have happened. History.

[pause for applause]

4 years ago I stood before you. I was a little more handsome, had a little less grey in my hair.

[flash smile]

[pause for applause]

From Michigan to Minnesota, from Delaware to Dubai, Harlem to Haiti, from Amsterdam to Atlanta, Los Angeles to Laos, Liverpool to Lexington, Texas to Tennessee, from Kentucky to Katmandu, New York to New Haven, from the great planes of Nebraska to the sweeping skyline of Shanghai, from valley to valley, mountaintop to mountaintop, from Australia to Anchorage, Illinois to Idaho, from Montreal to Mexico, Miami to Mali, from Mozambique to Moscow, Vermont to Vienna, from Gettysburg to Greensboro.

[pause for applause]

When I took office Iraq, Iraq, Iraq. I saved us from a great depression. We're adding good private sector jobs *cough cough*, no seriously folks, no joke *cough*. Ted Kennedy, Ted Kennedy, Ted Kennedy. China-never uh mind, uh. I shot those pirates, remember? Iraq, Iraq, Iraq. Iraq cost us a trillion dollars. Iraq, Iraq, Iraq. The Bush-Cheney recession. Iraq. I delivered change, to uh, well, Tunisia. I love the troops. I make love to the troops. Support the troops. Honor. Troops. Troops. Troops. Marines. Army. Navy. Coast Guard. Army Reserve. ROTC. Pimply faced kids playing Call of Duty 4 on xBox-360 who will soon be recruited to fly our UAVs. Education, I know I didn't get around to it, but I planned to, I swear. 4 more years. 4 more years. 4 more years. We're winning the war in Iran, a strong America will never replace the commander in chief during wartime. Strength. Unity Unity Unity. Winning. Tiger Blood. Republicans want to kill your grandma.

[pause for applause]

From Sacramento to Sarasota, from Iceland to India, Brazil to Bolivia, from Puerto Rico to Portugal, from Dublin to Des Moines, Arizona to Alaska, from Cleveland to California, from Newark to the Netherlands, the Philippines to the Falkland Islands, from Monaco to Madagascar, from Algeria to Albania, from Mississippi to Montgomery, from Arkansas to Albany.

[pause for applause]

Thank You and may God continue to bless these United States... ... ... ... of America.

Romney Prepares For 2012 Bid